New Experiences. Chapter 2
......
When I woke up, the morning sunlight had dimly illuminated the room, casting
an orange hue over the place. I realized that the blanket was clinging to my
leg, uncomfortably hot even though the fan above was pretty much doing a good
job of cooling the place. I kicked the covers and extra pillows away before
collapsing into a dreamless, sweaty sleep again.
....
It was past 9 when I finally woke up. I felt
unwell, with no appetite or energy. I barely ate what little breakfast I was
given and despite having no temperature, I had fully accepted defeat: No
college today folks!
It was all fun and games when afternoon arrived with the most
devastatingly-high fever of a 39.7 °C. Before checking my temperature, my
mother was convinced that it was just a normal fever and would abate by
tomorrow maybe. But when she caught sight of me tangled in a mess of my blanket
, jacket and pillow with the most defeated-looking , sickly face ever , she
touched my forehead and lines of worry appeared on her face. The fever had made
me disoriented, drugged and utterly wasted because if I were to raise my
head and look around, my head felt heavier than anything and I would hit the
pillow, weakened and defeated. But all that time, my head was bursting with
images, thoughts and day dreams. It got to the point where I was actually tired
of running my brain to the ground with my constant mind-work.
I looked up at the white ceiling, listening to the blades of the fan faintly
whirring as I tried to conjure something interesting to imagine about. Except
that all I could possibly think about was,
“So hot...’’
"Huh, I wonder what's going inside my body."
"Could I sweat anymore?"
"I want to write so badly...”
"When will the new chapter be released again?"
"How's the college going I wonder?"
"So hungry... I want chips"
"Oh Lord, please wash away all my sins through this illness"
"Poor mom...she is already working so hard but how come I got sick
while doing absolutely nothing?! Am I THAT sensitive to this moody
weather?!"
"This is bad. I hope no one else gets sick"
"I DESPISE EVERY INCH OF THIS BECAUSE I STINK TO HIGH HEAVEN. IT'S AN
ABSOLUTE DISGRACE EVEN THOUGH I BATHED YESTERDAY"
"I want to sleep...."
I roll around the bed with these recurring thoughts when my younger sister's
voice interrupts me," Big Sister Yoona, here's you tea." I point her
towards the bedpost where she keeps the cup and frolics away towards her own
world, leaving me in my existential crisis. From beneath my blanket, I look at
the cup and the packet of biscuits next to it which looked untouched except for
the two biscuits I force-fed myself in the morning. Two glucose biscuits with a
side of 1 tablespoon of rice in the morning. Morning.... and it is
evening right now. And I am supposed to have lots and lots of fluids, fruits,
vegetables and everything green and dandy while my body is acting like a
heating system.
Just kidding though, but you must realize that I was very grumpy and moody
on the inside. We can all collectively agree that our body refuses to accept
even a glass of water when we are sick. I like tea so my mood lifted up a
little when the deliciously warm cup of tea entered my system and lifted my
dampened spirits up a little. My mood was relatively piqued even more when my
cousin paid us a visit. I was happy upon her arrival because her’s was the only
house we visited during the pandemic which was literally less than a 5-minute
walk from our home. Needless to say, we shared a lot of laughter with her
during those depressing times that any visit to her house meant a week's worth
of serotonin and dopamine for us and her. We made brownies together, barbecued
during those closeted rainy days together, watched psychologically-terrifying
movies together and had twice more fun than that when our other cousins from
different prefectures joined us during those rare times.... The depressingly-
good old days (Mind you, we had our share of grief caused by the pandemic so
technically that's why I used the term 'depressingly-good ‘).
After a good hour of laughing, joking and talking, I feel chilly and cold
despite curled up in my blanket. We were in our living room and despite its
airy and cold atmosphere, I rolled myself up in the blanket and sat down the
chair to chat with her. I felt the same light-headedness that had plagued me in
the afternoon, feel the same heaviness on my eyelids as I walk myself towards
the big sofa in the hall. I lied down on the sofa and spent the next hour
napping spontaneously on it.
Sure enough, after my cousin left, my mother checked me
again and I was still having a high temperature. Given how the situation was,
going to the hospital was mandatory and there was no question at all that the
fever was normal. My mother suspected that there might be a chance of a Dengue infection
but for the love of god, I didn’t want any other suggestion because I have a
degree in overthinking which has led to my downfall countless of times.
As mentioned earlier, the weather next day was still up to
no good. As a matter of fact when my mother reached the decision to take me to
the doctor’s clinic, a violently-cold, brutally fast thunderstorm had broken
out. The road in front of our house turned into a muddy slipping slide due to
the thickly falling but slow rain. The weather showed no signs of stopping or
abating…neither did my fever. I looked out of the window, slightly shivering,
clad in the warmest purple sweater. As I stepped out of the door, the wind
almost made me flinch at its intensity, at its potential of almost increasing
my fever to an even higher level. I silently opted for shoes, glancing out of
the gate at our disaster of a road. The sky was pitch-black, tainted with
greyish clouds that showered us in what I (in my sickly state), had considered
then to be a test of my endurance. A test to see if I would start swearing at one
of Nature’s most bountiful offerings for which farmers pray.
This sentimental comparison is one of my dumbest qualities
because clearly it is just overthinking. I also tend to shut down emotionally
and cognitively when faced with challenging situations where there are
basically no options to choose from. Amidst the period when Covid had fallen
into hibernation for the first time after wrecking even more havoc in the
second wave, there was no way we could just sit the fever out.
My cousin was waiting at the end of the road with his car. He
was an angel in disguise. I have no flamboyant words for him, nor any
extravagant praises. Let’s just say that I have been blessed with the best
cousins; from the paternal as well as the maternal side. Through the rain, the
mud and the burning fever, his white car shone through my misery, consoling me
with its efficacy and the fact that I might actually get through this.
The night proceeded gracefully, the winds blew ruthlessly as
I tucked myself deeper inside my blanket. The warmth comforted me as my drooped
to sleep for approximately the tenth time in that day.
The end
And then we visited the hospital but no one cares about that
part because it was a normal fever after all (why did you have to scare me like
that mom?). And then we came back home, I was given my medicine and then sent
to sleep. The period of recovery included many nonsensical moments like
discovering fan-fiction (Book worms can understand. But I stopped before I could
fall headlong into the hole.) And another dreadful night when the fever wasn’t
budging. Overall, as a writer, this particular event felt oddly compelling to
write about and I hope that it was an enjoyable read.
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